Joined: Sat Mar 03 2007, 05:15pm
Location: creeping up behind you
Posts: 949
today i threw out the last three cigarettes i had and i am not buying any more. i have my mind made up and i am going cold turkey this time. i think if i use the patch, i will just get hooked on it, or go back to smoking. i think i have to just do it, all or nothing, like i did last time. what i have to remember is, this isn't about cigarettes, it's about my addiction. i am an ex-user, and cigarettes are just like dope for me. that's exactly how i did it last time and it worked. the reason i started again was because my (new) husband started smoking again after a year of not, and he spent a lot of time outside smoking, and i was afraid we would stop spending time together, so i started. also, i felt like i was being left out, or something stupid like that, so... anyway, today i quit.
Edited Sat Feb 14 2009, 12:47am
Joined: Wed Feb 28 2007, 12:14am
Location: Under Your Mom's Meat Flaps!
Posts: 14373
this isn't about cigarettes, it's about my addiction. i am an ex-user, and cigarettes are just like dope for me. that's exactly how i did it last time and it worked.
Space said this exact this ... ... I kinda did when I said "addiction is addiction, ... even if you aren't a bumbling idiot as a result"
Joined: Sat Mar 03 2007, 05:15pm
Location: creeping up behind you
Posts: 949
this sucks. i feel angry and hot. i feel deprived and selfish i feel like an asshole for saying this but i feel like it is my choice to smoke, and i should be able to do whatever i want. but the truth is, i also feel like i don't want to pay someone to kill me. i am doing this to myself. i am an addict. so i quit.
i am mad. i regret my decision right now, but later i will be thankful.
Joined: Sat Mar 03 2007, 05:15pm
Location: creeping up behind you
Posts: 949
bad. i hate this. i keep getting ready to quit, i quit, and then i go out and get more. and then i smoke and feel guilty because i promised myself i would quit. last time i just quit. i had this long distance friend, and i was going to go to vegas to meet him and we were planning to try to have a relationship. he quit and i knew he wouldn't kiss me if i was still smoking, so i quit. i guess that was my motivation. well, we eventually quit talking and went our seperate ways, but i didn't start up again. i was going to treatment at the time and i was able to talk about addiction every day in groups, and i understood smoking to be an addiction, so i applied my learned coping skills to not use or romance the idea of meth to smoking, and it really worked. i talked about it A LOT.
somehow, that is not working right now. i do know that i cannot taper off of cigarettes. i cannot use the gum or patches. that will not work. i have patches and i have been using them until i get more cigarettes.
i am trying to think of ways to get all that treatment information again, i forgot a lot of it i guess and i also think that i am having trouble with the fact that my husband is not quitting either.
back when i quit, i was single and living with people who did not smoke. that was easy.
it seems like when i get to day 2 i cave in and buy cigarettes.
i know, from reading at whyquit.com that day 3 is the hardest. i know if i can make it past day 3, i can do it.
