Hey ppl. Well I got a serious porn problem. I dunno when it started, probably when I was really really young. I'm 22 right now. Well I've always been obsessed about asses, and crap like that. I'm not gay but I just have an obsession with it. I can't even masturbate without thinking about ass. I'm seeing both a psychologist and psychiatrist right now for a different problem (PTSD from the Marine Corps) and I haven't mentioned this to them because I'm too embarassed and I'm worried they'll sign something to get me locked up for insanity. It may be because I was molested sometime in my life, but I don't remember any part of my life before 7. I just know that I was always obsessed with asses and anal sex way before then, before I even reach puberty and started to enjoy porn. Many times I'm pretty shy in real life and feel insecure. Other times I can be normal and funny with people. Honestly I tried to stay away from that porn stuff, but after a while I keep being really addicted and come back to it. Can anyone help?
Well, it's a really bad fetish. Recently in the past few months, I've been subscribing to these sites which are really sick. It's like simulated forced nonconsensual stuff, and weird. I'm not gay or bi, but I think about both guys (as well as myself) and girls in these situations. After I masturbate, I feel like crap and I was like WTF did I do this for? And then I get turned on a few hours later and do the same crap again until I get tired for the day. It used to be twice, now it's getting to be 3 times average a day.
OooooooH! ........I get that too! ....I know EXACTLY what you mean!
when I was a speedfreak with and using speed...
(you get twisted quite a bit....I don't have these fantasies sober...I think about 2 girls , 1 guy ....3 somes. )
........Sometimes, amoung other atrocities .. I'd jack off and fantasize about being molested orally at 6 years old....when I had no boobs...or pubes.
..............yeah man, it's gross afterward! ...ha ha ha! it's sick.
but, it's my fucking own memories....what can I say? ...........get over it!
I love porno, but when I cum, I'm done with it. .............the whole world is like that to a certain extent.
you are'nt looking at it exactly the same way, if you do keep looking at it afterward..
.....there's nothing wrong with you, unless you hurt you, or someone else.
there's nothing wrong with any sexul preference.... ....that's all it is is your preferance. it does'nt matter to me anymore than if you drink coke and not pepsi .....as long as I don't have to do any butt stuff... knock yourself out.
I bet if you met david bowie, he'd help you with these issues of shame.
......fuck anyone who judges you.
"Be who you are, and say what you feel, for those who mind don't matter. ...and those that matter don't mind."
Thanks for the advice, but I'm just worried that it's getting more and more worse. Well, the thing that gets me off is really sick thing like forced stuff with ass of either gender. it's been getting more and more extreme. Hell I used to get off just on seeing somebody naked (or their ass exposed at least) who is in the view of another person when I was very very very little. Yeah I used to get a chronic boner before I could even get a boner. It was more horny than anyone can ever imagine. Just getting off by seeing someone with their ass exposed to someone else. Now not even consensual hardcore gets me off. It's getting harder and harder for me to get off because each time I take a step further I can't go back to looking up less soft-core stuff anymore. I know the difference between fantasy and real life, of course. It always has been simulated stuff. If I knew it was real, I would be angry and sick as hell. More so, even.
Joined: Fri Jan 07 2005, 05:26pm
Location: Right here, can't ya see me?
Posts: 499
Well, if this is something that is really worrying you, and it seems it is, then I think you should mention it your therapist/s and see what kind of help is available. Maybe you could even find a therapist that specializes in sexual things of this sort? You aren't the first person to ever have this going on, and I'm pretty sure the therapist won't be that shocked.
On a side note, the default ct seems a good fit. :wink:
when a fetish is so much that it is a requirement for orgasm or sexual fullfillment, then that means that the fetish has gone too far. From the way you sound, it's getting into the realm of unhealthy. I would suggest you talking to your therapist about it. And find it's origins, which you've hinted at possibly stemming from something traumatic that occured in your life at a young age. Understanding it is key to conquerering it. I wish you much luck. Overcoming fetishes can be harder than some addictions.
Joined: Wed Mar 16 2005, 01:18am
Location: in a Finnish goat hut north of the Arctic circle
Posts: 1534
look into the prospects of hypnotism to get to the 'bottom' of this, that can help too, but you are probably in for some memory recall that is less than savory maybe look around for a therapist that is non-military. they are bound by their ethics code, and cannot blather about it. You would have better luck in a circumstance that is non-threatening to being truthful with yourself
If you decide that is best.
I guess I cannot relate to the intensity of this But, you at least see the difference between 'it' and what might be seen as 'normal' I would say it is not typical, but then again people IRL do not mention things like this early on in relationships.
To me, the keenness of your ass fetish is absolutely reeking of Dave's influence on some level, and it's rather ironic you come here to discuss this... and meanwhile poor Dave is under some type of gag-order not to.
I'm just scared as fuck to talk to somebody I know in real life. It's easy to talk this on the net cuz I dunno any of your faces, you know? If I do, then I would be really scared shitless to talk. Thanks for the advices. Maybe one of these days I'll get the nerves to tell my doc about this. Though I'm getting a new psychologist, and it's gonna be a she. Haven't met her yet, dunno how it will go for me to get my nerves and stop being a pussy.
)